But, there is tons of these tips out on the internet and on other blogs.
And what works for one person- doesn't work for another!
What I can do though, is open up my life to you. So you can learn the lessons I learn, and you can relate to me, and create a connection with me.
I have COURAGE.
The word "Courage" comes from the latin root "cor", which means to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart.
I have the courage to be imperfect. And I am willing to let go of what I thought I should be, in order to be who I am.
If you have been reading my blogs, you have learned my struggles as a model and with my ego, my struggles being bullied and not accepted. My struggles with what life is supposed to be, and my question of, "Why are we here? What is our purpose?". My experience with the death of family members, and my experience of cancelling my wedding.
Before I started this, I wanted everyone to think that I was "Perfect". That I live a fabulous, glamorous life as a fitness model.
Not anymore, I am going to fully embrace vulnerability.
I want to write about some lessons I learned from my cancelled marriage.
Cancelling a marriage two weeks before the date is probably one of the hardest things I've done. I want to share with you my experience of dealing with everything after such as: starting life over, my emotions of shame, guilt, sadness. And then dealing with the feelings of finding out that his heart was somewhere else (ouch). And while I was trying to move on, he visits my work with this new girlfriend.
Also... My experience of being the crazy ex.
Relationships can be compared to a job in a way: if you love it, you will do your best. If you don't like it, you will start slacking until you get fired so you can move on.
That is what was happening near our wedding date, both of us were slacking. I tried making things better, but it wasn't working.
In my heart, I knew I didn't want to get married. My brain was telling me to go through with it. Everything was set and paid for. Everyone was invited and they booked their hotel rooms. The resort was expensive for all of us.
I was in a very comfortable situation: had everything a girl could ever ask for. A man that loves her and will take care of her, a big beautiful house, the money, cars, food, dates, flowers, hot tub, gym, etc.
I read some articles, and talked with people.
I've talked with other women who, in the last moment, didn't want to marry, but went through with it... They ended up in an unhappy relationship- and they are too scared to leave it!
It would have been SO easy for me to go through with it! I could easily convince myself that I was happy and that I was making the right decision.
I thought about what would happen if I did cancel it... I would be going against EVERYONE's expectations! Everyone would be mad at me, I would have to have a good explanation... I would waste a lot of money, I would break his heart, I would have to start life all over...
But... as a Life Coach, I tell people to listen to their "gut", listen to their "heart". Because the heart cannot lie, whereas your brain can- Your brain can be conditioned.
I was willing to give up all my comforts, lose everything I have and all the dreams I have... To stand for my truth.
I found the courage within me- I stood my truth.
It WAS NOT EASY.
But... It was worth it. After the pain and emotions, and the closing of one chapter... It opened up a lot for me: Personal Growth.
Stand your truth... Listen to your heart.
Find the courage to be imperfect, and to let go of what you think you should be, in order to be who you are.
Things may be rough, things may be uncomfortable for a bit, but in the end, you are closer to being who you truly are.
Here's a genuine smile from me :)
Gotta love seeing naked people at the beach!
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